Joan's Unusual Life: Fluff Blood
by Wired Speed
Summary: High School Au with Gender Change? How innovative... Regardless Joan, Eren and Speedwagon have mini hijinks that definitely don't turn to tragedy when a certian blonde pops up.


Double checking your work? The fuck is that?

Eren Pendleton stretches his arms above his head and yawns. He had finished studying and now looked for something else to do. He looked around at the park and just people watched for a bit before hoping something came to mind. Just when he was about to pull out his sewing supplies and work on the scarf he was working on, a certain voice rang out.

"Oy Eren! I got a bone to pick with you!"

Eren turns his head and sees the school's resident thug, a miss Roberta Edith O. Speedwagon, or just Speedwagon for short. Speedwogan cut a pretty imposing figure, being taller than most girls and stronger than most guys. With a scar down her face and her trademark jacket everything about her look and manner spoke of a dangerous person, save for the checkboard pattern cap she wore for some reason. Eren tilts his head curious as what Speedwagon wanted with him. Speedwagon having reached the picnic table Eren was at, slams her hand on it. Eren knowing Speedwagon's reputation was somewhat fearful for his life so he decided to speak up and find out what he did wrong before he got knifed.

"Uh can I help you with something?"

"Oh you can help me alright... You can help me alright! Yo uppity little yuppy bastard, thinking the world revolves around them!"

Speedwagon shoves her finger in Eren's face.

"What are you playing at with Miss Joestar!"

Eren is now completely lost.

"Y-You mean Joan?"

"Don't you throw her name so casual like that!"

Eren was now under five minutes away from being stabbed but before that happened a figure came running from the distance. Speedwagon was near melting Eren with her stare so she was caught unaware as she got tackled by the figure and was knocked clear off her feet and landed in a pile under the them.

Eren jumps out of his seat to see what happened and sees the previously referenced girl, Joan Joestar pinning Speedwagon to the floor.

Joan was an odd sort, she was near top of the class in grades and relatively popular which contrasted sharply with her place in the boxing club. Underneath her dresses and prim behavior was a beast of a body, Eren could attest. Though that's not all Eren would attest to of Joan's... Regardless as to what that actually means.

"Speedwagon I told you to calm down! I told you Eren is a perfect gentlemen, there's nothing to worry about!"

Speedwagons squirms under her.

"N-No! I must *cough* examine his worth! *cough* Miss Joestar please your knee is crushing my guts!"

Joan noticing her error jumps off Speedwagon to avoid hurting her further and helps her up.

"I'm so sorry Speedwagon! I'm so sorry!"

Joan fuses over Speedwagon but she just waves it off and dusts herself of the dirt.

"*cough* I'm fine but uh Joan you might want to consider getting ready to run."

Joan tilts her head.

"Huh why?"

"Cause you just made a fool of yourself in front of Eren and there's no way out of this except running off."

Joan jerks her head in Eren's direction and sees him waving his hand sheepishly. Joan now extremely embarrassed is weak enough for Speedwagon to grab her hand and drag her out of the situation. As Eren looks on, they run out of the park and Eren is left about as clueless as he was from the start. Regardless he waves his hand in their direction and yells out.

"Uh hey Joan it was nice seeing you!"

[]

"Well that could've gone better."

Joan muffles something out from the pillow her face is buried in but Speedwagon can't hear it. Speedwagon scratches behind her head trying to make things better.

"Uh h-hey its not that bad it could've been worse! We could've taken Miss Zeppeli's advice! I mean you dressing like some tramp for some guy, pfft."

Joan raises her head from the pillow. "Speedwagon, I've seen you wear worse and you get mad when I scold you. How was Miss Zeppeli's plan different?"

Speedwagon put her hands on her hips. "Well cause im obviously a common tramp but you are a damn lady."

Joan sits back up from Speedwagon's bed. "Don't talk about yourself like that."

Speedwagon waves it off and looks around her run-down room that Joan keeps coming over to. The paint pealing in places and the room window looking out to a grimy alleywat.

"Eh you're too kind. Too sweet to be real."

She finishes by bending over and pinching Joan's cheeks. Joan pushes her hand away and pouts.

"Don't forget who won in our wrestling match."

"Pfft that was bull, you're not supposed to throw jabs that strong when wrestling."

"Says miss 'smuggling a sixth switchblade around is reasonable'"

Speedwagon flails around for a bit before jabbing a finger in Joan's direction, a swichblade falling out of her sleeve and clattering on the floor.

"Hey there's a lotta scumbangs out there!" She crosses her arms indignantly. "You gotta watch out 'specially if you're friend has a crush on one 'em"

"How is a guy in the home ec and sewing club a bad guy?"

"Tch its all just a ruse, I know guys like him. Prissy boy puts this nice guy aura and bam!" She smash her hands together. "There you are heartbroken and crying on sister Speedwagon's shoulder." Speedwagon sits next to Joan and slouches. "I just don't want to see you hurt."

Joan smiles at Speedwagon and puts her arm around her shoulder.

"Aw under the prickly face you're so sweet. Don't worry it'll be okay."

Joan nuzzles her cheek onto Speedwagon, causing her to look away to cover her blush.

"O-Okay that's enough of that. Let's go ask Miss Zeppeli again. See if she's got a different non-dressing-up-as-a-tart plan."

Joan lets go of her and nods.


End file.
